Rise From The Ashes: How We Will Win The TIGSource B-Game Competition

SpindleyQ's picture

OK, so it would appear that we have like a week left. It seems clear that we are lacking the tools and/or the will to actively collaborate on a single project. The only way I can imagine us pulling this off is if we somehow combine entirely unrelated throwaway projects.

Thus I declare the final direction of our project: THE EMERGENCY 100-IN-1 KLIK AND PLAY PIRATE KART MELTDOWN.

It will go down THIS WEEKEND and it will happen thusly: Like the Klik of the Month Klub, you have no more than two hours to complete a single game. UNlike the Klik of the Month Klub, there is no set time to start and end -- the Pirate Kart Meltdown runs continuously the entire weekend. The ultimate goal is to somehow collectively make it to 100 games. If we do not reach that goal, we'll repeat games on the menu with subtly altered names until we reach 100.

Also unlike the Klik of the Month Klub, there will be PRIZES. I mean, I've got too much shit in my house anyway. I'll post later with specifics of what you'll be getting (terrible games), but I see these categories:

The HOLY SHIT I'M DROWNING IN GAMES prize goes to the person who produces the greatest number of games in the 48-hour period.
The WTF IS GOING ON HERE prize goes to the person who develops the game with the most bizarre mechanics.
The VIVA VARIETY JOHNNY BLUEJEANS prize goes to the person with the largest range of game styles.

Voting in these categories will be open to everyone who creates games this weekend. Yes, even the HOLY SHIT I'M DROWNING IN GAMES prize is put to a vote. I just feel like it, that's why.

Either I'm ineligible for prizes or other people have to send me shit if I win. Prize donations are welcome.

ONWARD! UPWARD! JUSTICEWARD!

(Unrelated: Holy shit.)

SpindleyQ's picture

In the unlikely event that

In the unlikely event that we actually win the TIGSource competition, the Grindhouse book will go to the winner of the "HOLY SHIT I'M DROWNING IN GAMES" prize, while the copy of "Reach" will go to the winner of the "WTF IS GOING ON HERE" prize.

Pizza Time's picture

I think I can definitely do

I think I can definitely do a new version of Metal Axe Warriors, with an actual boss and ending and maybe music if I can find an app that will let me convert mp3s to midi so I can stick as many Dio and Metalucifer songs in there as possible.

And maybe something else, with punk rock, radioactive zombies and CPU choking amounts of blood.

SpindleyQ's picture

MP3 -> Midi is pretty much

MP3 -> Midi is pretty much not possible, but you may find people have already transcribed songs to MIDI for you, with hilarious results.

SpindleyQ's picture

Alright, here are the

Alright, here are the prizes, in reverse order:

The VIVA VARIETY JOHNNY BLUEJEANS prize is a copy of "Cowhunter", a PC game from 1999 designed to cash in on the "Deer Hunter" craze that boasts the slogan, "Udderly Mooverlous!" and a whopping three game modes -- including Cow Tipping. Apparently the same publisher released The Amazing Virtual Sea Monkeys, which is a must-buy title if I've ever heard one.

The WTF IS GOING ON HERE prize is a copy of "Virus: The Game", which is a game about flying around inside your computer's filesystem with your actual porn lining the walls. Apparently it comes with a free trial copy of McAffee VirusScan? I have no idea how well it will run on a modern PC.

Finally, the HOLY SHIT I'M DROWNING IN GAMES prize is a shrinkwrapped copy of "American McGee Presents Bad Day L.A. For Windows", which managed to score even lower than Cowhunter on Mobygames. I haven't actually played it, but I'm sure it will satisfy the masochistic urges that keep you coming to this site.