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Stupid People with Yellow Hair - Dedicated to Deceased Crab

moon.png
Game File: 

Just pretend the kid is Chester. No, I don't know what's up with the banana.

Made For: 
Pirate Kart 2
Smedis2's picture

Facade

FACADE STAGEPLAY
Sun Jul 29 21 48 57 2012

TRIP
Where are the new wine glasses?

GRACE
What for?

TRIP
That should be obvious!

GRACE
Oh God, Trip, don't turn this into a big production, please!

TRIP
Jesus Grace, come on, I'm not asking a lot here!

GRACE
What -- Trip, don't give me that look!

GRACE
You're going to drive me crazy!

MATT
dicks

(MATT knocks on the front door.)

(MATT knocks on the front door.)

(Trip opens the front door.)

TRIP
Matt!!

MATT
sharnar

TRIP
Hey! I thought I heard someone out here! Great to see you! It's been a while, how's -- (interrupted)

MATT
hi

TRIP
Uh...

TRIP
Uh, well, it's -- it's good to see you.

TRIP
Well come on in...

TRIP
Uh, I'll -- I'll go get Grace...

TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)

TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)

GRACE
No, no, here we are!

GRACE
Matt,

GRACE
Hi! How are you? Oh it's so nice to see you, it feels like it's been forever!

MATT
hi

GRACE
H-mmm (happy smile sound)

GRACE
And, I've got to say, you look really good!

MATT
WHAT NOW

GRACE
So come on in, make yourself at home!

TRIP
Huh, I'll close the door. -- (interrupted)

(Trip closes the front door.)

TRIP
I'm gonna fix us some drinks.

PHONE
** RING **

MATT
THE PHONE

PHONE
** RING **

PHONE
** RING **

MATT
Answer it?

PHONE
** RING **

TRIP
Oh, I'll get it --

GRACE
No, no, we have a guest, we can let the answering machine pick it up.

ANSWERING MACHINE
** click **

MATT
Answer it!

ANSWERING MACHINE
You've reached the fabulous new home of Grace and Trip. Leave us a message!

GRACE
What? Wait, wait, let's just wait for the answering machine...

ANSWERING MACHINE
** beep **

ANSWERING MACHINE
Grace, this is your father, I thought I'd call to see how my lovely daughter is doing.

ANSWERING MACHINE
I want you and Trip to come up to the house this weekend, your mother and I are throwing a party for a senior VP at the firm, and you should be there.

TRIP
Oh, it's your parents! I'll get it --

GRACE
Trip, Trip, please, I don't want to talk to them right now...

TRIP
I want to say hello --

GRACE
No no, Trip, we're entertaining a friend in our new apartment...

ANSWERING MACHINE
Oh, and be sure to arrive early, I want to talk to you about this business about why you won't be attending your mother's Christmas Eve gala.

GRACE
the last thing I want to do is talk to my parents.

MATT
It's fine

ANSWERING MACHINE
(clear throat) So, that's all. Uh, goodbye.

GRACE
Oh, ha ha ha, God, let's not talk about my parents... we've heard enough from them tonight.

MATT
As in?

GRACE
W -- well, no, talking about my parents is just going to frustrate me.

MATT
What did they do?

GRACE
Matt, seeing you again makes me remember the wonderful times we all used to have. H-mmm (happy smile sound)

TRIP
Ha ha, yeah...

MATT
Like when I killed that hooker?

GRACE
uh...!

TRIP
(nervous coughing)

GRACE
(nervous coughing)

TRIP
geez, I'm not, uh...

MATT
ANYWAYS

GRACE
ha ha ha ha ha, heh...

TRIP
(nervous coughing)

MATT
It was a joke

GRACE
ha ha ha ha ha!!

MATT
What now?

MATT
The drinks?

TRIP
ha ha, heh...

TRIP
heh, ha ha ha!

TRIP
Ha ha ha, Matt,

GRACE
heh heh heh...

TRIP
heh heh, you had me going there for a sec...

TRIP
heh, ha ha...

TRIP
You're not afraid to say anything, are you?

MATT
Nope

TRIP
put us on the spot...

TRIP
heh heh, you're crazy, heh, you know that?

TRIP
ha ha...

TRIP
(big sigh)

MATT
That's just the begining

TRIP
Anyway, uh... what were we talking about?

MATT
Drinks?

TRIP
I'm gonna fix us some drinks.

TRIP
Good news, I just fully loaded -- (interrupted)

MATT
Sure

TRIP
Y -- yeah, yeah, time for a drink.

TRIP
How does a martini sound?

TRIP
Everybody tells me I fix the -- (interrupted)

MATT
Sure!

TRIP
Beautiful!

GRACE
No no,

GRACE
Matt, maybe you'd like some juice, or a mineral water?

MATT
Nah

TRIP
Excellent! It won't take me more than a minute!

GRACE
(little sigh) I sometimes wonder if Trip spends so much time fixing drinks to avoid having real conversation with the guests.

TRIP
What? What was that?

GRACE
(clears throat)

MATT
BURN

TRIP
wasn't...

GRACE
He is...

TRIP
You...

MATT
I said that out loud

GRACE
It just occurred to me... uh...

GRACE
Oh we need to make sure we -- we look at... uh...

TRIP
Right...

GRACE
refrigerator light bulb thingy...

TRIP
we should get that looked at...

MATT
Oh

GRACE
Oh, right! Right! Yeah...

GRACE
(long release sigh)

MATT
Can I help?

GRACE
yeah...

GRACE
So, Matt, you can help me understand where I went wrong with my new decorating, ha ha.

TRIP
Grace, oh, no, we don't need to do that.

MATT
It looks fine.

TRIP
Ah, yes, Matt, I knew you'd like it. See, Grace?

GRACE
(frustrated sigh)

GRACE
So, about my decorating...

GRACE
Uhh, you know, I've been collecting these little glass sculptures for God knows how long now.

TRIP
I always hear people talking about them at our parties.

GRACE
but now whenever I look at them, I suddenly get such a... such a... headache!

MATT
Parties?

TRIP
Oh, yeah, you know, I think I'll fix us another drink in not too long...

GRACE
I bet I can return most of this, and start over again on this room...

MATT
It looks fine.

GRACE
Uhh!

TRIP
See, Grace, as always, you're the only one unhappy with your decorating.

GRACE
Uhh... right, I know, I'll never be satisfied with it, -- (interrupted)

MATT
Not the best. Not the worst.

TRIP
Matt, yeah, Grace, nothing's wrong, everything's fine!

GRACE
Huh, you two really are getting along well tonight, heh...

TRIP
(little sigh)

TRIP
Ah, Matt, you probably didn't come here to hear this, heh...

GRACE
What?

GRACE
Trip, it's okay if we disagree in front of our friend --

TRIP
Disagreeing?! We're NOT disagreeing.

TRIP
We're not.

MATT
I HATE CONFLICT

TRIP
You don't agree? uh... okay, well...

TRIP
Oh, Matt, I thought you might like this photo I just put up from our recent trip to Italy.

GRACE
Uhh, it's a beautiful picture of the Italian countryside, of course he'll like it!

TRIP
Grace, I know you don't like it, but our friend might.

GRACE
By the way, anybody, join me on the couch if you like.

TRIP
Um... uhh, Now, Matt, in one word, what does this picture say to you?

MATT
gay

GRACE
Say to -- (interrupted)

TRIP
Mmm... no...

GRACE
Wait, what's wrong with that? That's a perfectly fine answer!

TRIP
(little sigh) No just take a look, this says...

GRACE
How about controlling.

MATT
gay as hell

TRIP
Romance! No it says... romance...!

GRACE
Romance? Ha, in our marriage, that's just a code word for manipulation.

TRIP
Grace, it'd been such a long time since we'd... had a chance to -- -- (interrupted)

MATT
more like NO-MANCE AHAHAHA

GRACE
Yeah -- no -- Trip tricked me into going!

GRACE
And you knew I planned to attend my friend's art show that weekend!

GRACE
A very good friend from college had a gallery show of his new paintings that weekend, and I missed it!

TRIP
What?

TRIP
Ahh, this is bullshit!

GRACE
Ahh, no, you're full of shit!

GRACE
Goddamn romance...

GRACE
Trip, our whole marriage, you're so... controlling! -- (interrupted)

MATT
Why do you have that 8-ball?

TRIP
What? What -- what are you saying to me? What?

TRIP
(little impatient sigh) Matt, I...

MATT
That thing in your hand

GRACE
Uhh, can you -- can you just...

TRIP
Goddamn manipulation...

TRIP
You never listen to me! You don't believe anything I say! You just don't listen.

GRACE
Oh, God...!

MATT
YOU ARE TEARING ME APART

GRACE
Alright, you know what, Matt,

GRACE
I need to ask you something.

TRIP
Grace --

GRACE
Trip, let me ask our guest a question.

GRACE
Matt, yes or no...

GRACE
Do you think it's _wrong_ for one person in a marriage to listen _too much_ to the other?

TRIP
What?

GRACE
To trust your husband or wife too much, to rely on them too much? Is that wrong? -- (interrupted)

MATT
Yes....

TRIP
What...?!

TRIP
Oh, yeah, that's fine... that's fine...

TRIP
Uhh, I keep trying to help you Grace, but you reject me, you cut me off, you cut me out of your life, goddammit!

GRACE
Oh, that's great Trip!

MATT
You hate me now, don't you, tripp?

GRACE
Uhh! Yeah, good, go away!

GRACE
I can't stand you!

GRACE
Dammit, Trip!

MATT
It's fine.

GRACE
What? What are you saying?

TRIP
What? Are you talking about me in there?

GRACE
I wasn't talking about you!

GRACE
Matt, I can't believe you have to see this...

GRACE
uhh...

MATT
what?

TRIP
Matt, (annoyed sigh) Grace is just so...

GRACE
Oh, we're talking about me again, are we?

TRIP
What?

TRIP
Matt, look around this apartment. It's got everything anyone would ever want. But, Grace, oh no, she's never satisfied.

GRACE
Trip, ... ugh ... I'm so sick of this.

MATT
It doesn't have food.

TRIP
Matt, come on, I don't feel like fixing drinks at this moment!

TRIP
Uhh...

GRACE
Let's keep talking about Trip.

TRIP
Look around here. We're doing well, really well.

MATT
Can you two GET ALONG?

GRACE
God, Trip, I can't believe even now you're still...

TRIP
Oh yeah, you'd never admit that I've created a good life for us.

GRACE
Dammit Trip!

MATT
Why do you keep arguing?

TRIP
Ah!

GRACE
Matt, you're saying I'm... angry?

MATT
Over stupid shit like that.

GRACE
No?

TRIP
You've always been angry about something, Grace... if it's not one thing, it's another...

GRACE
Uhh...

MATT
I'm not taking sides here.

TRIP
Let's talk some more about Grace.

GRACE
Trip, it's your fault -- ten years ago, freshly married and just out of college, you convinced me to go into advertising, instead of art!

TRIP
What?

GRACE
If it weren't for you, I could be a real artist by now.

TRIP
Uhh... Matt, uhh...

MATT
YOU CANNOT INTO MARRIAGE

GRACE
Look, if we're going to talk about marriage, all I can say is, it doesn't turn out the way you expect it to.

TRIP
Grace...

GRACE
I'm not saying marriage is a bad idea or something, I'm just... saying I think it's hard to predict what it will actually be like...

TRIP
Grace, no...

TRIP
No, no, look, marriage is -- uhh... is this great thing -- (interrupted)

MATT
JESUS CHRIST SHUT UP

TRIP
Alright, Matt, that's it, you've got to leave.

TRIP
I'm sorry, but, uhh, I don't know what the deal is with you tonight.

(Trip opens the front door.)

TRIP
We'll be fine -- you should just go.

MATT
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WIFE

(Trip closes the front door.)

MATT
the den

jan_strach's picture

Poor Thing Update: A Video!

Dear Glorious Trainfriends,

This time I do not have screenshots from Poor Thing to share with you. I have something better! A video presenting it in action! I think it starts to look good, but judge for yourselves. My video editing tool did something horrible with compression, but you can still see what the game is about. I tried to present the things I am most proud of: the Merry Berry minihotel, scrolling levels, floor tiles adjusting to scrolling, some shadows and 3d grass (only in the 1st level but will be implemented overall). I hope you like it! I work on it nearly every day and had a sleepless night sometime ago when I put a lot of things together so I have the backstory also more advanced. Ok, enough, enjoy, and tell me hwat you think!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDqoCDa60QE

resaworld

resaworld.png
Game File: 

Event Created For: 
Made For: 
An event
atuun's picture

What The World Sees With Electric Eyes

sees.GIF
Game File: 

Watch TV!

Click the "next" button to change channel, and the arrows to control the man.

Made For: 
Pirate Kart 2

These automatic arms.

screenshot103.png

You appear not to be in control of your arms.
Bystanders may be in danger.
A tinfoil hat might help?
Reunite with your child and give them a proper hug.
(Made for Molyjam NYC.)

Update:

v1.1: -- one new gameplay mechanic, two new rooms, four new bystanders, thirteen new pieces of tinfoil, zero new easter eggs, debug keys removed or better squirreled away, slightly augmented fifth room clue, a few minor bugs squashed, 'hallway' room's doors open faster, N Key will now speed through the intro and outro screens, first room's tinfoil text appears more quickly, cute but capricious switch-up removed from ninth room, your child loves you just a little bit more.

Author: 
fort/da
Made For: 
An event
RehaSoft's picture

Klik and Play Marathon

Mon, Nov 11 2013 07:56 PM
11/11/2013 - 19:56
12/31/2014 - 14:56
Etc/GMT-7

An event where you use Klik and Play to make games! I'll try to post some older games of mine, as well as mine also! Making this a year-long event.


Games made for Klik and Play Marathon

dessgeega's picture

azteca queen

this is aztec challenge for the commodore 64.

it was originally created for the atari 400 by robert tegel bonifacio, but was ported to the commodore in 1984 by paul norman, the author of the famously gory forbidden forest. daphaknee and i were playing commodore aztec challenge on our friend miguel's huge tv the other night when he discovered that paul norman ported the game again, to flash, in 2003, armed, apparently, with a kit of stock poser animations and a newfound admiration for the female form. azteca queen splits the difference between awkward movements and highly sexualized deaths admirably. this six-part story of an aztec princess on her quest to fuck the snake god quetzacoatl culminates in tenochtitlan, where you give a sword a hand-job before fending off pirouetting gladiators. will you rule the aztec empire as the consort of the feathered snake?

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Thomas Ingham

While playing through Ludum Dare 29 entries I stumbled upon the games of Thomas Ingham, and the three I've found are all wondering trainwrecks.

Actinium the Wrought is a hack n' slash type deal, where you are a caveman looking for his brother, and clobbering things along the way.
http://www.ludumdare.com/compo/ludum-dare-24/?action=preview&uid=14469

In Mega Friendship Battle Elevator you ride an elevator. On each floor a bunch of enemies enter and the camera stares at your front. An enemy spawned on top of me and I died before I was able to press a button.
http://www.ludumdare.com/compo/ludum-dare-27/?action=preview&uid=14469

Chupacabra looks like a 3-D mascot platformer, but kind of reminds me of Castlevania 64. There is a disobediant camera, and a lot of tunnels. It kind of nauseated me.
http://www.ludumdare.com/compo/ludum-dare-29/?action=preview&uid=14469

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