mario

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bagenzo's picture

marios pilonidal cyst surgery

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warning: surgery

mario gets pilonidal cyst surgery after falling too many times

this came to me in a vision while i was shaving

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gisbrecht's picture

Dr. Gnome

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Dr Gnome is a terrible doctor

he has no medical license

WARNING: spawns about 900 objects accidentally, do not play if you have like 1 gb of ram

For Grid 2 Reverse Gravity World + Fantasy Creatures + Medicine

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gisbrecht's picture

Bowser, I Love You.

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Bowser, I Love You
KoopaTroop909 ||| Review by Mariken S.
Here’s a queer one- and I mean that in the most literal sense of homosexuality. Bowser, I Love You is a fan game of the Super Mario franchise which concerns the turtle-like nemesis of Mario in a more romantic spotlight than usual. That is, the usual is a vague, cartoonish approximation of heterosexuality; a grim parody of Saint George and the Dragon. The Princess is kidnapped by the turtle-dragon named Bowser, and Super Mario promptly vanquishes the villain in the scope of about an hour. Revisionist fairy tales love to focus on the maligned monsters, and now such a trend has come to the sphere of computer games! In the pseudonymous nature of the internet, the creator of this game calls himself “KoopaTroop909”, the word Koopa is in fact the name of Bowser’s henchmen and his name in the Japanese editions of the Super Mario Bros. games. Clearly, this man is devoted to Bowser even in his choice of username.
The usage of the first person pronoun in the title clearly invokes a most intimate sentiment. Yet, who is the pronoun referring to: the player avatar who is thankfully not Mario or to the creator of the game, our dear KoopaTroop909? There is the titular confession at the beginning of the quest, yes, but this does not cancel out the maker’s sentiments as well. Could the hero of the story not feel genuine affection for the tyrant turtle? I suppose putting the player’s sentiments into the hero could create something to that effect. It is a well known fact that games of a production caliber not up to snuff are often played simply to gawk and mock at it by performative players. We ought to assume good faith of a hypothetical player and their assumed concern of Bowser.
The game begins with a mockery of Super Mario, Blaurio, making his way to the castle of the villain. He proclaims his unending devotion and love to Bowser with a bouquet of flowers. The King, in shock, comically sets the flowers and Blaurio alight! He accuses the hero character of being a spy for Mario, to which the hero refuses. Yet, outside the text of the game, the creator KoopaTroop909 serves this character in a roundabout manner. Even in a game where Mario is antagonized, he is still there! He is a prefabrication of what many people believe to be computer games, an easy semiotic so to speak. It is free advertising anytime he is inserted into a game, there is no escape. Regardless of this, Bowser demands the decapitated head of Mario— a quite un-Nintendo proposition. Blaurio agrees and sets off on an adventure.
The actual game play is of little interest. It functions as one would expect a Super Mario game to be: you jump, you squash and you die! Thankfully there are only four worlds with three levels apiece, if there were any more I think I would have given up. There is a nice touch being that instead of turtles, you face the bumbling servants of Princess Toadstool named Toad en masse. Anyone learned of this fiction’s setting (which is a surprising amount of people given the statistics of the Super Mario Wiki) knows that the turtles and brown mushrooms are the underlings of Bowser and thus it would be illogical for the player to fight them. The green dinosaur Yoshi is a halfway point boss who lobs green eggs at the player, thankfully it was not too difficult. The final world is a peaceful white and red castle in which the dreadful Mario inhabits. Blaurio faces off against Mario in a surprisingly and annoyingly difficult battle. At the end of the battle, the axe seen at the concluding levels of the original Super Mario Bros is used in a fantastic fashion that can probably be inferred from the previous paragraph. Suffice to write, Bowser reciprocates Blaurio’s love.
The credits say the usual— Nintendo’s ever-present dominion on copyright and giving thanks to all the people who extracted artwork from the computer games in a presumably illicit manner. The one unusual thing is KoopaTroop909 describing his intimidation with other men, his blooming bisexuality and his entryway through the love of Bowser, the turtle king. It is a small piece of the whole game but I think it is what makes it worth playing. It’s a sort of real life to virtual life connection, on how the two can influence and metamorphose each other. I give much praise to KoopaTroop909 for this odd little gem.

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fotocopiadora's picture

VIDEOPULP: Super Carty™'s Dread

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VIDEOPULP: Super Carty(tm)'s Dread

by Mariken S. and fotocopiadora
2019

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INFORMATION

Video games.... are they just garbage?

From the creator of the award winning BINKY series and the maker of Muscle World (featured in PC Gamer, whoever they are?) comes a new video game based on real world events. Please make use of the supplemental material provided in the folders to immerse yourself in the world of truthful information and fully understand what it means to be VIDEOPULP. Thank you and "veel geluk"!

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CONTROLS

WASD/Arrow Keys - move
Mouse+Left Click - navigate menus
Numbers 1 Through 0 - it's a secret

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TIPS AND TRICKS

- Press SPACE(?) during the introduction sequence to make it go faster
- Be careful not to breach copyright law
- Books contain important information

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CREDITS

- Samples from James Ferraro - KFC City 3099
- Samples from Ishikawa Kozue - Boss Fight (W*rio Land 3)
- Samples from Super M*rio 64
- Club Nintendo Extra article translated from Dutch by @gamegeschied
- Text from Christopher Marlowe's Doctor Faustus

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SPECIAL THANKS

- Pedro Paiva for making M*rio Empalado
- @gamegeschied for translating the article and uploading many pictures of M*rio mascot
- Supper Mario Broth for posting M*rio mascot with steamroller

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Author: 
Mariken S. and fotocopiadora
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gisbrecht's picture

Dracula's Condemned Castle

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Dracula's Condemned Castle

Dracula's Castle will be destroyed in the next two minutes by the Translyvanian government if Dracula doesn't get enough MONIES!!!

Dracula has to collect BLOOD to become Batula... this form is faster and invincible... and plus it looks cool.

Yes this is a secret sequel of sorts to Dracula: New Order
https://scratch.mit.edu/projects/25023163/
Please don't comment on my voice...

Controls:
W - Start Game (Please Read Comic First)
AD, Arrow Keys - Move Left and Right
Space - Turn Invisible

Collect 3 Blood Bags to turn into BATULA

Credits:
Music - Alexander Scriabin - Mazurka Op. 40, No. 2
Various KNP sound effects
"Blood!" sound effect from Delta State TV show
Yellow Mario from Super Mario Bros. 3
Steamroller from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure
Spectral Bat head by Ernst Haeckel
Moon from Le Voyage dans la Lune by Georges Méliès
Various KNP Art

Thanks:
Noum for accidentally reminding me to use Mario
Bram Stoker
Bela Lugosi

Author: 
MarikenG
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Smiley Island

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SMILEY ISLAND is VAPORWARE. Please share it with your friends! It was developed from scratch in Klik & Play during the late 90s and has been resurrected. This is not your run of the mill platform game! Smiley is based on Pac-Land and Super ZZT Land among others. Features include parallax scrolling frontwards and backwards, elegant collision detection, re-purposed arcade-style graphics and a full size course with room to spare! The project aims to push KNP's limits with only minor adjustments in Fusion for the WIN32 and HTML5 builds. Support the development of this game by donating.

Author: 
nanoco
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gisbrecht's picture

Chip's Challenge - Weegee

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FOR MILLIONS OF YEARS PEOPLE HAVE wondered: why cant weegee be in chip's challengE?

today, the world has changed

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hugs's picture

Paxta Buxtor: Spexialty Go Unit (for Lynx)

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this game turned out to be kind of a mess, but i hope you do enjoy.

description of game:
crush your enemies and collect all the coins. it's the life of a princess.
you get points by collecting the coins. you lose points by getting blown up. you also lose points by getting bumped, and you lose even more points when you get bumped or blown up while you have powerups. you should collect those powerups, though, and avoid touching anything unhelpful. if you die on zero or fewer points, it's game over! theoretically, though, you can finish the game with a negative score. if you're clever.

music featured is by abstraction!

controls:
arrow keys or wasd - move
space or z - fire your weapon
x or tab - switch between your weapons
p - pause the game
r - quick restart after game over

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Johny L.'s picture

Super Mario Bros.'ed.

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This is my own Super Mario Bros remake, i hope you enjoyed it.

Special thanks to Zorak for the mario sprites.

Author: 
DrBlowhole20
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